"My name is Mortimer Pinkly Stubbard. Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding." ~ Chosimbaaaa 

Chosimbaaaa was born in Birmingham, Alabama (USA) July 14th, 2005. He loves chicken, America, big trucks. It is said he once was told to get to bed early, and he screamed at his mom until he burst a blood vessel in his eye. She tried to stop him, but caved in after he blew his other eyeball. It is said that Chosimbaaaa always get what he wants because Chosimbaaaa wills it to be so. 

His mom rarely lets him use the computer, but when he does: he is really good at it.  

Chosimbaaaa was born a poor chimney-sweep into a rich family (the exact family from the remake of Annie) - except imagine Eminem produced it. He bought his first pair of aviators and ever since then, whores have been throwing their skinless bodies at him since he was a wee lad. 

Chosimbaaaa was cast in the popular 1970s television series The Waltons as Walton's Mountain resident Horace Chosimbaaaa, in seven appearances from 1974 through 1977.

The following 4 paragraphs will seemlessly blend into the rest of the wiki even though they are 1-for-1 copied from Wilford Brimley's wikipedia. Chosimbaaaa became famous later in life for appearing in such films as The Hotel New Hampshire, John Carpenter's The Thing, and Cocoon. In 2001, he starred in the Turner Network Television film Crossfire Trail with Tom Selleck ( Chosimbaaaa's second time with Selleck,after having worked together in the 80s film High Road to China). None of that is true. He expanded on this characterization as the world-weary manager of a slumping baseball team in The Natural, a film in which his friend Duvall appeared as an antagonistic sportswriter.

Chosimbaaaa was cast in the 1983 film Tender Mercies due to the urging of Robert Duvall, who was not getting along well with director Bruce Beresford and wanted "somebody down here that's on my side, somebody that I can relate to." Beresford felt Chosimbaaaa was too old for the part, but eventually agreed to the casting. Chosimbaaaa, like Duvall, clashed with the director; during one instance when Beresford tried to advise Chosimbaaaa on how Harry would behave, Duvall recalled Chosimbaaaa responding: "Now look, let me tell you something, I'm Harry. Harry's not over there, Harry's not over here. Until you fire me or get another actor, I'm Harry, and whatever I do is fine 'cause I'm Harry."

In a change from his "good guy" roles such as those in Our House, he played William Devasher, the ominous head of security for Bendini, Lambert & Locke in the Tom Cruise film The Firm (1993), based on the novel by John Grisham.

Chosimbaaaa has frequently appeared in commercials, notably a series of commercials for Quaker Oats Oatmeal throughout the 1980s and 1990s. The Quaker commercials were famous for their slogan: "It's the right thing to do and the tasty way to do it." Chosimbaaaa is also known for appearing in numerous television advertisements for Liberty Medical, a company specializing in home delivery of medical products such as diabetes testing supplies. Chosimbaaaa has been described as "a fine singer with a warm, rich voice". In 1993, Chosimbaaaa sang with the Cal State Northridge Jazz Band for a concert benefiting the college's Jazz Endowment Scholarship Fund; in 2004, he released This Time, The Dream's On Me, an album of jazz standards named after the Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer-penned title track. 


- James

- Nic

- Pancake_Boat

- Tickld

- Abi

and tenss more unconfirmed alt accounts